With Friends Like These (Spongebob Version)
by Parent12D
Summary: Spongebob wins two tickets to the Karate Fighting Match, causing Patrick and Sandy to see who should go with him. Based on the Rocko's Modern Life episode of the same name. Rating is K .


**Ladies and Gentlemen, here's a new fanfiction I did for Spongebob, and the name of it is called:**

 **With Friends Like These (Spongebob Version)**

 **If you must know, this fanfiction is based off of the Rocko's Modern Life episode of the same name, and the main characters play the specific roles;**

 **Spongebob is Rocko,**

 **Patrick is Heffer,**

 **Sandy is Filburt (Yes it's true).**

 **Anyway, enough with the rant, let's just the story now. Enjoy everyone!**

 **Spongebob is owned by Nickelodeon and of course by Stephen Hillenburg.**

* * *

The story begins at the radio station in Bikini Bottom, where it is called 102.6 FM in this story. Running the talk show was a male fish dressed like a reporter but his eyes are bloodshot red and he had 12 cups of coffee in 3 days.

"Good evening to all you listeners out there," The guy known as Fred announced. "This is the talk show on radio 102.6 speaking in our third day to this contest to win two tickets I tell you,"

He splashed coffee on his face to keep himself awake. "The two tickets to this weekends event of the year, to the K.K.K.K.M.E Karate match event at Karate Stadium,"

At Sandy's Treedome, Sandy and Patrick were taking part in the contest as the room was full of telephones, they were destined to win.

"For this contest with the winner, I'll be taking caller number 92," Fred announced.

 **"GO!"** Sandy cried out as she and Patrick started dialing phones.

"Yeah, Yeah, Yeah, Yeah," Patrick said repeatedly.

"Sorry your caller number 1, Sorry your caller number 2, Sorry your caller number 3," Fred announces.

"I want it, I want it, I want it, I want it, I want it," Sandy said picking up every phone and dialing.

Fred kept speaking through the radio as he only got to the 22 caller. Patrick was getting upset as he then said.

"THEY'RE ALL BUSY!"

"Don't you give up on me now Patrick," Sandy called out. "Keep on dialing, we will see that match!"

Patrick kept picking up several phones and after a few moments, he waved his arms fast getting tangled in the phone wires, as he heard a ringing sound.

"It's ringing. Sandy, do you hear it," Patrick got Sandy's attention. "It's ringing…"

 _"IT RINGING!?"_ Sandy charged towards Patrick. _**"WHICH ONE IS IT!?"**_

"Ringing…" Patrick muttered to himself.

"Hey, are you the 92nd caller," Fred asked.

"Yes, yes," Sandy started picking up phones and speaking. "I'm here! I'm here! Hello! Hello!?"

Sandy picked up phones rapidly as she eventually got tangled up in the wires like Patrick did. A beep was heard on the radio as Fred said.

"Hello, you're the 92nd caller!"

The 92nd caller was revealed to be none other than Spongebob.

"Hello, is this Mario's Pizza Castle?" Spongebob asked.

"No man this is Fred of Radio 102.6 and you just won the tickets."

"Oh, whoops," Spongebob realized. "I must have dialed the wrong number."

"No bro, this is the right number to win two tickets to the Karate Match at K.K.K.K.M.E this weekend," Fred announced. "HAVEN'T YOU BEEN LISTENING TO MY SHOW!?"

"Well, I was just a little hungry and uh…" Spongebob started.

 **"DON'T YOU LIKE KARATE!?"** Fred screamed.

"Uh yes," Spongebob sounded skeptical. "I love karate. I love to go."  
"Well that's cool man," Fred then announced on the radio that Patrick and Sandy heard. "Congratulations go out to Spongebob Squarepants of Bikini Bottom. He just won 2 tickets to the Karate Match this weekend!"

Sandy turned off the radio as she and Patrick had a moment of silence, staring at each other.

"So… That's that then," Sandy said.

"Yeah, guess your right," Patrick agreed.

They took another moment to think before saying anything else.

"Well, it couldn't have happened to a nicer guy huh?" Patrick asked.

"Oh yeah, yeah, Spongebob deserves to go to the Karate Match," Sandy stated.

A moment later Patrick decided to leave and go back home.

"Well I'm gonna go home now and clean out my rock," Patrick made way to the exit.

"Yeah I got some cleaning I gotta do around here," Sandy said as Patrick got out of the Treedome.

"See ya Sandy," Patrick waved.

"Yeah see ya," Sandy said. A moment later, Sandy slowly closed her Treedome door, and the moment the door was completely closed, Patrick rushed to his hot boatmobile (the same one from Driven to Tears that he somehow managed to retrieve and also got a new license) and then he started it and drove off at a fast speed through the streets of Bikini Bottom, not watching where he was going and actually hitting someone.

"MY LEG!"

Patrick then made it to Spongebob's house as he crashed his boatmobile into a tree, rushing out and heading for the door, bursting it open as he then shouted.

"HEY SPONGEBOB, HOW HAVE YOU BEEN!? ANYTHING NEW GOING ON!?"

He then realized that Sandy made it to Spongebob's house first as she was on the couch with the yellow sponge.

"So you were actually just trying to order some pizza?" Sandy asked as he nodded yes. "Wow, you tell the funniest stories."

They then started laughing as Patrick started frowning. Spongebob then saw Patrick at the door.

"Oh hello Patrick," He greeted. "What brings you around here?"

"Yeah," Sandy asked suspiciously. "Whatever could it be?"

"Oh you know," Patrick sat on the couch too. "Just in the neighborhood, wondering what you were up to."

"I just got done telling Sandy that I won two tickets to the Karate Match this weekend," He explained.

"Karate, oh what's that?" Patrick asked him.

"It's this weekend, at the K.K.K.K.M.E this weekend and I won two tickets to go,"

"Really, no kidding," Patrick stated.

"So…." Sandy wondered. "Who you gonna bring?"

"Gee, I haven't given it much thought," Spongebob looked at both Patrick and Sandy. "I guess I'll invite one of my friends."

* * *

 **THE NEXT MORNING…**

* * *

Spongebob had just woken up and was wearing that green bath robe of his (the same one from Jellyfish Jam) as he headed to his bathroom but was surprised when Patrick jumped out and shouted.

"GOOD MORNING SPONGEBOB!"

"What are you doing here so early?" Spongebob asked him.

"Oh you know, just passing by, and I say what the heck, I get your toothbrush ready for you," Patrick hands his toothbrush that was all ready for him.

"Gee, thanks Patrick but I…" Spongebob sounded skeptical as Patrick interrupted him.

"Think nothing of it old pal, now you get washed up while I go and make us breakfast." Patrick tossed Spongebob into the bathroom as he closed the door and sang. "I'm going to the Karate Match, seeing people perform Kung-Fu!" He then skipped away.

* * *

Some time later, Spongebob headed for the front door, oblivious to the fact Sandy was in his kitchen as he said.

"Oh well, I'll just get the newspaper and then-"

He was cut short as he heard a bell go off in the kitchen. He looked and saw Sandy was cooking some muffins.

"Good morning Spongebob!" She greeted him.

"Sandy," Spongebob wondered. "What are you doing here so early?"

"Well, I found this new recipe on making fresh muffins," Sandy approached him. "So I figured 'who would appreciate me waking up at the crack of dawn to make him breakfast?' Spongebob, that's who,"

"But I though Patrick was gonna make breakfast," He sounded skeptical as Patrick was sitting at the table.

"Don't worry about him, just sit down," Sandy suggested as Spongebob sat down in the seat across from Patrick at the same table. "I made eggs, pancakes, sausage, as if some big fat greedy slob hasn't eaten it already. So, I'll run and get some nice hot coffee that I made for Spongebob!" She went to get it.

 _"That I made for Spongebob,"_ Patrick mocked as he then muttered. "Hmph, phony bologna. Squirrel trying to get the Karate tickets."

"Okay! Here it comes! Nice and hot!" She went to Spongebob holding a pot of coffee when suddenly, Patrick tripped her and she screamed and accidently splashed the hot coffee onto Spongebob who screamed as well as he then fell off his seat. Patrick then asked.

"Gee Spongebob, would a friend do that to a friend?"

Spongebob was covered with coffee and got up.

"THAT'S IT!" He was clearly getting annoyed now. "I know you both wanna go to the Karate Match but buttering me up won't work!"

He then went out his front door leaving Sandy and Patrick inside.

"I haven't decided who I'm gonna bring!" Spongebob stated as he was then surprised to see Sandy using a reef blower to clean off his yard while Patrick was polishing Spongebob's bike (since he didn't have a license).

"Hey Spongebob, just doing a few chores for you!" She said to him using the reef blower.

"Your bike's all washed and ready for a busy day!" Patrick stated as Sandy then blew some kelp on the bike, ruining Patrick's job.

* * *

Sometime later, Spongebob was now at the Barg N' Mart shopping as he was deciding what cereal to get.

"Let's see, what cereal should I get?" He asked himself as Patrick then called out.

"Hey Spongebob they got some Sugar Kelp O's here, you like those ones right! Oh wait, oh wait, how about the Ice Cream Flavored Kelp cereal!? There's a delicious Ice Cream in every bite. Oh wait oh wait, I know I know I know! This is your favorite cereal!"

Sandy then knocked the shelf onto Patrick as she shouted.

"I GOT IT!" As she was holding the traditional ordinary Kelp O's.

* * *

Sometime later, Spongebob was now riding his bike through Bikini Bottom as he then stopped in front of the movie theater (the same one from Something Smells) as Patrick got his attention by shouting.

"Hey Spongebob! Remember we saw the movie here together!?"

Sandy then used the same boom technique used in Mermaidman and Barnacleboy VI: The Motion Picture as the theater then blew up and Spongebob continued on ignoring there antics. Sandy was then seen in front of another building wearing the same band uniform she wore in Band Geeks as she conducted a marching band to play as she said.

"1, 2, 3, for he's a jolly good fellow!"

A motorcycle being driven by Patrick zipped by and sent Sandy and the Marching Band skyward as they were then screaming. Patrick then got closer to Spongebob and was wearing a helmet too as he said.

"Hey Spongebob, check out this new motorcycle I got! You wanna go for a ride on it?"

Sandy was then shown carrying a telephone pole as she rushes and swung the pole towards Patrick, causing the both of them to be sent backwards with the motorcycle with an explosion and punching noises being heard as Spongebob continued on.

Patrick and Sandy then rushed to Spongebob as they were then being dragged until Spongebob made it home and then got off and headed for the door, but turned to face Patrick and Sandy and then said.

"Listen guys, I'm not sure who I'm gonna-"

Sandy cut him off by rushing over to him and held him by the shoulders and said.

"Before you say anything else, I just wanna tell you, that I love you, and I highly respect you."

"HEY WAIT I LOVE YOU TOO SPONGEBOB!" Patrick rushed over.

"GO AWAY ANCHALOAFER!" Sandy snapped at Patrick.

"WAIT, IT'S NOT FAIR!" Patrick cried.

Having just about lost his patience, Spongebob had had enough as he then shouted.

 **"THAT'S IT!"** Spongebob pushed both of them off and snapped. "YOU TWO ARE SUPPOSE TO BE FRIENDS! I MADE UP MY MIND NOW! I'M GOING TO THE KARATE MATCH TOMORROW MORNING ALONE!"

With that being said, Spongebob slammed his door shut harshly leaving Patrick and Sandy to glare at each other.

* * *

 **THE NEXT DAY…**

* * *

It was now morning again as Spongebob's foghorn alarm went off as he then turned it off and let out a yawn and a stretch, as it was then shown that his right hand was now handcuffed. Still waking up, he slowly looked at the handcuff and saw Patrick was in his bed and had handcuffed himself to Spongebob.

"You have to take me now Spongebob," Patrick said with that creepy smiley stare on his face as Spongebob was still waking up. A moment later, Spongebob snapped to and realized that Patrick handcuffed himself to Spongebob as he then sneered.

"PATRICK!"

"Maybe we should get something to eat before we-" Patrick was cut short as he grunt and Spongebob dragged him downstairs and grunted.

"I've had it with your little games Pat. I already told you I'm going to that match alone," He opened the door and demand with his left hand pointing out. "So I want you to unlock me and shuffle your big fat butt home, THIS INSTANT!"

Then by surprise, Sandy jumped out and handcuffed herself to Spongebob's other hand that was free as Spongebob then noticed this.

"YOU GOTTA GO TO THE MATCH WITH ME NOW! YOU GOTTA GO WITH ME!" As she was laughing, Spongebob then showed her that Patrick did the same thing already. "How do you like that for genius?"

She then laughed maniacally for a few moments, but then stopped when she saw Patrick was handcuffed to Spongebob too and gave him a glare. She then sneered.

"WHY YOU BIG FAT DUMB STARFISH!" She screamed as Patrick approached her, growling with Spongebob being dragged. "I CAN'T BELIEVE IT!"

"WHY YOU IDIOT STUPID SQUIRREL," Patrick screamed. "I HAD THE IDEA FIRST BUT YOU THEN STOLE IT AND MESSED EVERYTHING THEN YOU TRIED BUTTERING HIM UP!"

Spongebob was being tossed around in all directions.

"He's going with me to the match!" Sandy sneered.

"He's going with me!" Patrick sneered.

"He's going with me!"

"He's my friend more than yours!"

"Forget that, he's MINE!"

"No way, I'm not gonna hear it, you don't EVEN LIKE KARATE, I GAVE YOU THE WHOLE IDEA TO START!"

It was then that Sandy and Patrick started arguing and speaking at the same time as Spongebob was being tossed and swung around against his will. A moment later, Patrick and Sandy then walked off to the stadium dragging poor Spongebob with them as they then argued about who is a better friend to Spongebob while the poor sponge was being hit by several objects.

* * *

Patrick and Sandy then argued that Spongebob tried to help Patrick with the problem towards his parents to make him look smarter, how Spongebob helped Patrick get an award, how Spongebob helped Sandy with her hibernation issue, and how Spongebob and Sandy fought off that Alaskan Bull Worm. Spongebob then hit a pole as Sandy then argued with Patrick.

"I'm getting in with that ticket!"

"No way," Patrick argued. "It's me who's going, you don't even like Karate!"

"What are you talking about," Sandy stated. "I am the ultimate fan! I have all their albums, I have all their records!"

Sandy then stated that Patrick is crazy twice and states he has something called 'Crazy Starfish Disease' while Patrick was wondering why Sandy even wears that air helmet to breathe when she can't even take in reality the way it is and states that there's the real world and then there's Sandy world. Spongebob meanwhile was run over by a bunch of football players, dragged through Goo Lagoon and hit by a ski boat and then was stung by a bunch of Jelly Fish.

When they were almost to the stadium, Patrick and Sandy were still arguing and dragging Spongebob.

"I WAS THE ONE WHO TRIED TO HELP SPONGEBOB GET CURED BY THE SUDS! YOU DIDN'T DO MUCH ABOUT IT!" Patrick argued as Sandy countered by shouting.

"I WAS MARRIED TO HIM! I WAS MARRIED TO HIM! DO YOU UNDERSTAND WHAT THAT MEANS!?"

"THAT WAS A PLAY AND YOU KNOW IT SQUIRREL!"

"YOU'RE THE ONE TO TALK TRYING TO IMPERSONATE A DOCTOR!"

"I WAS JUST TRYING TO SHOW MY LOVE FOR SPONGEBOB!"

"FORGET THAT!"

"LAST WEEK I TRIED HELPING SPONGEBOB WITH HIS ISSUE WHEN HE WAS STUCK IN THAT WRINGER AND BROUGHT HIM TO SUPER WEENIE HUT JR. FOR ICE CREAM! DID HE WANT TO EAT ANYTHING!? NO, BECAUSE HE COULDN'T EAT!"

"YOU MADE IT WORSE FOR HIM BY USING FOREVER GLUE!"

"You got you're tickets?" The ticket man interrupted the argument.

 **"HE COULD HAVE DIED OF STARVATION PATRICK!"**

 **"OTHERWISE I WOULD HAVE SHARED IT WITH HIM SANDY!"**

The argument then ended as they saw Spongebob lying down, asking if he was okay and then helping him up.

It was safe to say that Spongebob looked battered, bruised up, had bloodshot eyes and was twitching and only in his underwear since he couldn't change up.

"Oh… Oh oh, right, the tickets," Spongebob started sounding battered up.

"Yeah yeah," Sandy and Patrick then said together.

"Hey wait, where are they," He went into his underwear and took out the two tickets he had, showing them to Sandy and Patrick. "Ah yes, this is them. Here they are, the tickets. Here they are."

Spongebob then went insane as he then ripped the two tickets into shreds while shouting.

"Oh boy! Look at that! Look at that! Look at all the tickets!"

"A ticket for you," He tossed one ticket shred pile towards Sandy. "And a ticket for you," He tossed another pile to Patrick. "And tickets FOR EVERYBODY!" Spongebob threw the remains into the sky like confetti as he then screamed.

"NOW WE CAN ALL **GOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!"**

After screaming, Spongebob then blacked out as he then fell over and was knocked out unconscious. After witnessing the outburst, the ticket man then concluded.

"So I guess you don't have the tickets."

Sandy and Patrick were speechless as they said.

"No I guess we don't."

"Yeah, guess your right. No tickets."

They then both looked at Spongebob who was knocked out and they looked guilty.

* * *

A while later, the three of them were back at Spongebob's house as Spongebob was up again and as Patrick was using a hammer to break apart the handcuffs, Sandy looked at Spongebob and said.

"Spongebob, I can't tell you how sorry I am about all this,"

"Oh that's okay Sandy," Spongebob forgave her and Patrick for their actions earlier. "You and Patrick just got a little carried away, right Patrick?"

Before Patrick slammed the hammer down again, the radio was on as Fred then announced another contest.

"Hey all you sea friends, we have another contest for you all," He announced. "Be the first one down here handcuffed to your best friend, and receive two tickets to this weekend's Monster Ship Rally!"

Patrick then slammed the hammer on Spongebob's hand as he and Sandy made a bolt for the door, dragging Spongebob with them.

Outside, a lot of people were running and handcuffed to another, including Squidward and Squilvia (his girlfriend), Mr. Krabs and Mrs. Puff, with a bag of money, Plankton and Karen, and a bunch of other people including Tom the chocolate obsessed guy, Fred the guy who screams 'MY LEG', Mr. What Zit Tooya, and a lot more too.

To no surprise, Patrick and Sandy were arguing again.

"HE'S MY PAL, YOU DON'T EVEN KNOW HIM!" Patrick shouted.

"ENOUGH COMMENTS FROM YOUR DIMWITTED CALENDAR STARFISH!" Sandy snapped back.

They continued arguing as Sandy states she tired of dealing with Patrick's dumbness while Patrick states Sandy doesn't know a thing about Karate or Monster Ships.

"I LOVE MONSTER SHIPS!" Patrick shouted. "MY FATHER WAS A MONSTER SHIP!"

And thus now this story has just come to an end now, and this is it…

 **THE END!  
**

 **THAT'S IT EVERYONE! HOPE YOU ENJOYED THIS STORY! THIS REALLY IS BASED OFF OF THAT EPISODE OF ROCKO'S MODERN LIFE OF THE SAME NAME, AND I REALLY FELT THE NEED TO CREATE IT TOO, SO THOSE OF YOU READING THIS WHO KNOW ROCKO'S MODERN LIFE RECOGNIZE THE SIMILIARITY, WELL YOU WILL PROBABLY GET THE THEME!**

 **ANYWAY, THAT'S ALL FOR NOW EVERYONE! BE SURE TO LEAVE A REVIEW FOR THIS STORY!**

 **BYE NOW!**


End file.
